I can't win.
Even when I get to go back to work............well, I gotta go back to work.
They missed me. Like Nor-leanzers missed the rain after Katrina I'm guessin'.
Judging from the comments like "How the hell do YOU get a vacation!?" and "You weren't HERE last week!?" I'd say they were all traumatized.
At least their minds werent idle. The local rumor mill was in full operational mode while I was away, and it took all of 15 minutes at work to hear it/them.
Apparently, the reason for my injury/malady/infection/trip to the shore, was because I got accosted by the mascot kitty on the job.
I gotta give em credit for this one, its creative. And this time, the rumor didnt stop at the bottom of the office steps like normal "hired help" rumors. This one made it all the way to the top, and had enough weight to warrant a visit from my boss, on the site today.
"So I heard you got scratched or bit by the kitty..." he said.............(insert deer in the headlights look right about here)
"huh?" was my poignant reply. "Who the hell said THAT?"
Then the "eep opp ork's" started flying. "um, I mean.....Uh, no one in particular" fingers pointing in about 12 different directions.......
Its not like I was fingered for the Brinks job or anything, but what the frick!?!?
Talk bad about MY kitty will ya??
I just laughed, actually. And I did say "you gotta give them credit for this one..."
I'm figurin the reason for the visit, was that my boss had already had a battery of lawyers working on a workman's comp counter suit how it wasn't the company's fault that I got scratched by the jobsite mascot (while supposedly working). And all that.
I just smiled and thought "unfrickinbelieveable". Cant even get injured without it turning into a scandal of some sort.
I was going to say "its not like I got PAID when I didnt work", but thought better (for a change) and let it all go.
Blindside me once, oh well, blindside me twice, shame on me.
I didnt get reprimanded or anything, it was just a weird conversation. Kinda like him saying, "you're the best employee I ever had, and here's a great big ole fat bonus", and then in the next breath, he says "get the hell outta here, I've had it with you".
Dont know which way to turn.
Just smile and numbly walk away.
At least the kitty came up to me today. IT was happy to see me. And it didnt even know I stopped and got some friskies before it came up.
I actually got to pick it up today, and it didnt scratch me or gouge my eyes or tear my heart out or anything.
well................there IS this one mark..................but we wont tell anyone. It might start a rumor or something.
Back to work. Not as funny as I thought it was going to be.
Weird, weird day.